How winter wonderland terrified me and reminded me of the true meaning of Christmas

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Not exactly full of Christmas spirit – particularly with Santa being shoulder humped by a naughty elf in the corner

 

I walked through the muddy cesspit that is currently Hyde Park to experience Winter Wonderland. I will let the photos speak for themselves but it is worth noting that I saw not one but two mothers spill beer on their children.

As I walked through this expensive muddy horror show I was reminded that Christmas is all about family. And I was thankful that I don’t have a dad that yells “Fuck off, they’re my Christmas chips” in the middle of a crowded Christmas nightmare.

 

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Oh cool, we can drink overpriced mulled wine while slowly turning in a circle.

 

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We have the North Pole in the background and the Alpine Noodle Bar in the front, smells like Christmas to me.

 

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Finally we have XMAS CHIPS, I love the traditional aspects of Christmas. Ten points if you can explain the purpose of the promiscuous mouse plying her trade in the barn window.

 

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I don’t even know with this one. The kids were going mental for it. The parents were mental to pay for it.