1. Eat McDonalds: you know there is going to be one at every airport, and to be honest you have far higher chances of getting edible food there then at any other airside restaurant. Besides, airport calories don’t count.
2. Silently judge the parenting decisions of others: I don’t know what it is about airports that turn otherwise calm and competent parents into terrified babysitters but it can be very entertaining to watch “no honey, don’t throw another perfume on the ground. If you put it back like a good boy I will buy you McDonalds*”
3. Walk into the airside designer shops like you own the place, then try to find the perfect bag to match the traveling hobo look you are currently sporting.
4. Plan your next holiday based on how happy people look to be waiting at the gates
5. Randomly start running to a gate and see how many people panic and join you
6. Get inspired, buy a new notebook, start writing, read it back, think it looks/sounds/tastes stupid, tear out the page and start again
7. Go to a book shop and using the magazine section try to name:
– All the Kardashians
– All the children of Brad and Angie
– The current political leaders of the G8 (for bonus points, also name the current political leaders of the UN Security Council)
8. Make a new friend/boyfriend/sworn enemy
9. Panic when you feel like you left your suitcase somewhere**
* See note one
** That same suitcase that you checked in an hour earlier