Which blogger tribe do you belong to?

It is the pause that defines us, the collection of seconds after someone asks ‘why did you start blogging’. Of course everyone has their own story, but after attending a few tweet-ups and PR events I have heard enough replies to be able to sort them into the following categories.

Which one are you?

The Professionals

Portrait of a female executive

These are the kids  that have the marketing degrees, MBAs and are taking on this blogging lark for the challenge or career push. They talk SEO like other people talk Made in Chelsea and  inevitably find almost instant success because, hey they did it right from the start. Although it has to be said, blogging for the Professionals is a  targeted campaign rather than a passion, so while they may get the views, re-tweets and invites this is just another job for them.

The One Hit Wonders

One-Hit-Wonders

‘Oh my god, I’m a blogger too!’, sorry sweetheart three posts from 2009  does not a blogger make. This tribe generally have a Facebook friend who is a blogger and thought that looks easy, I can do that. But after putting all the effort into the URL and finding the right blog template writing sadly fell by the wayside.  As a general rule, you can call yourself a blogger when you have contemplated throwing your laptop out the window at midnight because you promised the internet you would write a post for the following day.

The Missings

missing

This is actually a majority tribe, although the members may dip a toe into the other tribes from time to time. These are the bloggers who were missing something from their lives, who needed a kick up the wazoo, who wanted another label and blogging was the answer. Always looking longingly at the Professionals, the Missings will try to decipher the SEO babble and may go to the lengths of downloading Hootsuite, but at the end of the day they are there for the passion, not the profession.

The Train-wrecks

Train Wrecks

When your world is crashing down around you a blog can be the perfect answer. Screaming into the endless storm that is the internet is the perfect therapy, and it can be damn entertaining to read.  With a shelf-life of a year, these bloggers normally transfer to one of the other tribes after that, if not … well lets just say regular blog posts are the least of their worries.

The Moms

dv1953010

I don’t think I even need to explain this one, but here goes. Characterized by the tendency to over-share, casually talk about bodily functions and unintentionally polarise readers on seemingly uncontroversial subjects (breastfeeding anyone?). More than any other bloggers the Moms will fiercely defend their turf, although this is mostly because the turf if their children. Post wise the Moms are the most unpredictable, you never know when they will have a free nap time to write so there may be a week of nothing before three posts in a day. The Moms are the ones to follow if you want to figure out the PR system, they have the free samples and invites down to a fine art.

The Privates 

privateson-parades_2423627b

Read a blog about amazing things, places and eats but know next to nothing about the writer? It must belong to one of the Privates, the rare breed that want to be seen, heard and talked about but not if it has anything to do with their actual life. This tribe can be relied on for historically accurate posts, complete exhibition guides and detailed restaurant reviews, although the reader will always be left just wanting a little more.

 

5 Comments

  1. March 24, 2014 / 1:42 pm

    Love it!

    • runawaykiwi@gmail.com
      March 24, 2014 / 8:44 pm

      Love your face!

  2. March 27, 2014 / 9:10 am

    This was hysterical! Well done! “Casually talk about their bodily functions…” made me giggle. While I’ve only been blogging for six months, I definitely appreciated your categories, as I’ve certainly seen each of them. LOVED LOVED LOVED the Vanilla Ice picture!

  3. happyeverafterbride
    March 30, 2014 / 12:59 pm

    I suppose I’d fall into the privates category. 🙂 I always thought I did lifestyle though… 😉
    Funny post, I liked reading through it.

  4. May 11, 2014 / 4:00 pm

    Ha! Brilliant. And so true. Says a Missing. (Not to be confused with the “Wildings” from Game of Thrones which is what I think of when I hear “The Missings”.)