Things I have learned since moving into a studio flat

Runawaykiwi studio flat london


  • Never NEVER overcook broccoli. If you don’t know why I suggest you go into your kitchen now, boil broccoli for five minutes and then smell the rotten fart of Mordor.
  • On smells, candles are great and will make your flat smell like a dream HOWEVER there are certain smells (bacon I’m looking at you) that candles can’t overpower and instead your flat will smell like a Greggs/Lush hybrid.
  • You will think you can get away with not owning a vacuum cleaner because it’s such a small space surely you can use a brush and pan. You will be wrong. Turns out the vacuum cleaner is the greatest invention of all time.
  • It is impossible to open the door to tradesmen without it feeling a little bit like a porno.
  • You can never invite a boy to hang out without it feeling like a euphemism (the bed is in the living room).
  • There is nowhere to hide your washing. You will pretend your washing is a Tracey Emin installation when friends come over.
  • You will fall over three times when walking from the bed to the kitchen before you learn to walk like a human.
  • If you move something in your ‘livingroom’, like a bunch of flowers maybe, to a new place you will wake up thinking someone is sitting in the corner watching you while you sleep.
  • If one thing is messy your entire house looks messy.
  • 5 gin bottles as the focal point for your flat is a brilliant idea.
  • If your sink is deep enough you can hide two days worth of dishes in it and everyone will think you are tidy.
  • Having your own space is entirely worth it.
  • It is only two months in that you will realise that what with the curly hair, being a writer, living in a studio and drinking slightly too much you are essentially Carrie Bradshaw.
  • You will hate the above realisation.
  • Having such a small space you don’t need a tv, it looks better without a TV. Every so often you will want a TV.
  • There are only three good hiding places when you are playing hide and seek.
  • A rug will make it feel like home, particularly if said rug reminds you of a medieval joust

Runawaykiwi gin farm

Author: runawaykiwi

6 thoughts on “Things I have learned since moving into a studio flat

  1. random gandalf next to gin? this is brilliant! my living situation being quite similar, you are absolutely right.. wanted to jump on the minimalistic train but I actually like when a place looks “lived in”. happy weekend!

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